Friday, 10 April 2020

The Waves of Grief poem

The Waves of Grief

It doesn’t matter how strong
When the waves come they batter
It doesn’t matter how sad
Those waves crash over, no matter
How prepared
#How surrounded by those you love
Nothing can stop the push of water
The pull of the undertow
Trending water
Going under
Come back up
Put on a brave face for shoe

But the pressure of the sorrow
Actual hurts in my chest
The pressure of tomorrow
I feel under duress
To keep going
Despite the siren call to
Stop floating
And just let go
To know
I will not see you again
Is just too real, too surreal

The waves come crashing
Taking my breath away
And I say
“I miss you Dad”
And I keep swimming
Heavy legs and struggling arms
All twisted and uncoordinated
My world turned upside down
Disjointed, discombobulated
Life jacket
Comes past out of nowhere
I just grab for whatever
I don’t care

I’ll take a hand, a laugh, a smile
And hold it like I’ve been given gold
A moment of happiness
Or gratitude
Wherever I can find it
Like a pearl in an oyster
Or a piece of driftwood to hold

When dragged under or over by the waves of grief

Battered and broken
Drowning alone
Those precious moments of human empathy
Can remind me of home

I am Dadless, I am sadness
This is who I am now
But there is happiness
And memories to hold on to too
I am sadness, Happiness
Laughter and loss
Darkness and light
Solid and ghost
I am strong
I am weak
I am a human who’s grieving
I am silence
I am song
I am grateful to be breathing

The poem was written by Viv Chamberlin-Kidd 
17 days after her Dad’s death on 25/01/20

Here is a video of my saying the poem on a FB ‘live’ on 10th April 2020 can be viewed here on YouTube

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